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House of Cards: An LGBT Podcast
House of Cards: An LGBT Podcast

Episode · 3 months ago

House of cards: an LGBTQ podcast: Male sex health

ABOUT THIS EPISODE

Today! We talked about life and how things are going! Our topic was male sex health, and did we go deep. As a statement, men do not understand their dicks but they do like touching them! Check in next week for a new epsiode! If you don't oh well, have a good rest of your life and remember you are vaild as fuck! 

Twitter: @LGBT_deck

Instagram: @houseofcards_podcast

Tiktok: @houseofcardslgbt

Written by Avery Ann

Edited by Jaxson Stiles

Produced by: Jaxson , Avery and Simon

Music: Lofi-Missing memories , lofi fading away, lofi fly and lofi escapie,

Hi, y'all. Welcome to theHouse of cards and lgbtq plus podcast. I'm a Brian. I used toher pronouns and I'm one of your lovely hosts for this evening. Really,you are you? Well, you know what you are. Gay. Absolutelyall right. I'm Jackson. I'm a gay host. I use he himfrom and my doctor went to seek from to my legs. Hello. That'sadorable. Yeah, we love Hi. I'm Simone. I used she,they pronounced and my mom said the cover of one of my books for English. The guy on the covers really hot solid. Yeah, and that's somethingeveryone wants to hear. I know it's it's the cover of a street cardnamed desire and it's just the shirt loos dude wearing highwaisted pants. It's reallyfunny to me. We should get your wow dad some high waisted pants maybe. Oh my God. Yeah, okay, anyway, it's do you want tofind us on social media? You can follow us on Instagram at Houseof cards underscore podcast, on twitter at lgbt underscore deck and on Ticktock asHouse of cards podcast. Really, that's all social media. Yeah, thatis our social media. Jackson. That was so attack Jack's house. YourThumb Best Under house arrest. What Jaw's your thumbs better? It's still likecrispy, but put some barbecue sauce on...

...that baby. Oh, about tenminutes ago Jackson at our house arrest. Oh well, my craft over inin minecraft because there was a crime committed. That was it. And Actually,Um, I'm a fine subspect with someone and I'm enforcing is my fridsuspect. So it's really funny. Well, like, I think it's you.I think it's you, minecraft among us, minecraft a US. Ohmy God, wait, it literally, Oh my God, the among us, another portal. Moving on, Amory, you want to tell us what happenedas you were trying to get your do you want to tell us whathappened when you're trying to get your way here? Oh my goodness, yes, okay, so it was like six twenty right. My roomy and Iwe went to goodwill and play those closet and we were on our way backat twenty and the bus was supposed together at like seven ish and it's onlya five minute like drive back to my building and Lo and behold, weget to the bust up and we're waiting and then it's ten minutes after sevenand the bus still is in there. It had been delayed. So thenit finally got there like ten minutes after it was supposed to. We hadstarted standing up and like dancing around to keep ourselves warm. I was doingthe Cadillac ranch and I was in the middle of doing the like three youknow, like when, after you do the toe taps, you'd like kick, you hit the heel and then you hit the heel again and then youlike flick behind and then you turn.

I was doing the turn and Isaw the bus coming around the corner and I screamed at it. Oh myGod, I look. That's so much. Yeah, the power of the Cadillacbranch commanded it. Oh my gosh, that's the most Canadian thing I've everheard you say. The Mount Thank you. I love that. Clapand a half to that. A clap and a half clas and that's somuch. That's a clap a half. Yeah, it was a time.So what has anyone else been doing anything fun recently? I'll be all justhave been growing its fuck drugs. Yeah, I'm boring. I've been doing nothingbut minecraft pretty much. I mean that you've literally been playing minecraft everysingle fucking day. No, not for the past few years, not forthe past two years. I do not have that kind of attention span.By Guy. Yes, you do. Stir watching Chicago met on Netflix.I Love I've never seen it. I should lie like this. It's avibe, you know, like Spencer Hastings older sister on pretty little liars.Yeah, she's one of the main characters. Oh my God, I recognize herimmediately. I was like, Oh my God, she's so gorgeous.She was like my first girl crush. Really, we love that. That'shot. Well, actually, Spencer was, technically, but her sister was aclose second. Nice. That's fair. You know what else was there?What your mom mayor we put doctor of sexs hello, I've got ahow be what? I just gave myself...

...plastic surgery with tape. Sorry,what again? Takes too sorry. Say That again. Just I just gavemyself plastic surgery with tape. What did you do? So, you know, like when you give yourself that boot job you wanted? No, youknow when people like flip their upper lip up to look like that Bitch fromOuter Banks? No, I don't watch it either, but people, peoplelike glue their top lip like flip upwards, and it's so funny to be soI didn't tape. I mean, yeah, why not? I have, as you have, that hasn't a scotch tape, which I should neverbe given. You should be at you should honestly access to nothing. Yourmean. And Anyway, I'm pretty sure we should be getting into our topic. Yeah, probably, no. Okay, are we gonna segue or just jumpright in? So sex happens, and when sex happens, mail suitsto a penis. Let's get onto penis has nice. Today it all upin the literal junk, the actual drunk. We're going to put it in ourhands, investigators of the male reproductive system. If you don't remember ourepisode on puberty, the male reproductive system consists of your Uretha, the penis, the testicles, the prostate and other vesticles that contribute to spam and seemin production. Similar to episode on can you please let me do what I'mgonna do. Yes, sorry, this is literally the sex that I like. You like them too, not so...

...much anymore. Fair, but,Bab we never like them to begin with. We cannot discriminate against people who wereborn with these and chose to remain with these. It's you know,they can't do anything about it that it looks like a wrap. okay,understand it. Just it. Just please respect you know, I think thatabout Vaginas, but I was doing that. Oh, I understand. Similar toepisode on Boop Health, today we're going to be talking about what kindof things for abnormal when you see a doctor and just general health tips.That Pun was definitely attended. Do not be leave a very she try tosay it was not. It definitely was. It's not. Please remember we arenot medical professionals, we are simply three Queer infits. I am personallynot an infant, I'm a toddler. Okay, anyways, no, okay, broadly, reproductive health covers infertility, stis and cancer, along with awide range of other issues, including bladder and Piss problems. I'm just kidding. Your refer problems. I mean that is piss problems. It's kind ofa piss problem. Yeah, fair love, kiss problems. Okay, the SCARTUS off. We don't love them actually, but continue hisss problems.Yeah, it really sucks. Love the name on a valid as fluck love. That sounds like a good tick tock artist album. Oh my God,wait, I'm going to make an album that's called it's proble. Oh myGod. Okay, to start us off, here are five basic tips to keepthat Pun intended to keep the reproductive system healthy. What regularly screened forSti's to practice good hygiene by changing your underwear regularly. Please fucking do this, Pesti, please. Best. Yes,...

...yes, I have some bad news. You have to change your fucking underwear. I suffer depression. Okay, yeah, me too, but if underwear clean, and clean your stuff. I hate the word genitals. Wow, I don't know it just okay.Three, maintain a healthy lifestyle, for quit smoking. Maybe, yeah, but visit your doctor. Don't start smoking, by the way, just, you know, just don't start it. Now that FIT's out of the way. It I'm not saying it's penis dime. I thank you very youknow, welcome every you said that with a little too much excitement. Iwould like to have a conversation with you later and my office. You havebeen reported to hr meet me in the private chat. Okay, pen ashealth refers to infertility. Your nation issues and directions. Oh not, you'rea nation issues sus, your nation, one of the most commonly known penalissues is a reck child is function. I have that, you know.Actually, can I do you REPLA actually not so funny story about erectile dysfunction, which should never start a sentence that way ever, but it's like ithas been shortened to like Ed in the past. But personally, whenever Isee ed I think eating disorder. So there was an instance where I wasreading something about erectile dysfunction. I don't...

...know why, but I kept thinkhe was about eating disorders and I kept reading and I was like, whatthe fuck kind of eating disorder is this? And I was very confused. Moving. We love you so much, a very like you, our favoriteperson in the entire universe. Sorry, thank you very much. As youguys were talking, or as I was talking, he's like what the fuckare you talking about? rectile dysfunction? Oh my God, and you like, because I have, I bet he does. He has. Like Jacksonwrote the episode. I didn't. That's I didn't write. You chose thetopic. Yeah, no, I chose the mail reproduction house. Yeah,not fucking. What's it called? Correct erectile that function. I did not. This would be in this actually punched myself with the face. How didyou do that, reproduct, you sally push yourself in the face where youtrying to pull up your blankets? No, I was okay, it is actuallypunched myself. I was swinging around my headphone cord and it has alittle thingy for the volume and to turn the microphone on and off, andit smacked me. A rectile dysfunction is the inability to get and keep anerection or, alternatively, the inability to turn a windsock into a flightful.Sexual dysfunctions, such as a rectile dysfunction can be caused by age, differencesin hormone levels, anxiety and depression, certain medications, high blood pressure,diabetes and Lightis and certain neurological conditions in turn, like a depression. Yes, it already said depression. I know, I was just rereferent. I was, you know, like correlating depression,...

...depression, depression in terms of thepenis getting its job done. Protect your junk against Sti. Is,by using a condom. Also prevent from accidentally bending and erect penis, asit can cause a traumatic penis fracture. Examples can't be found on gray's anatomyand new girl are sight girl? Really, yeah, really, yeah, that'sit. Group Cook Penis. Oh Shit, I'm not gonna lie,I remember the guys show. Yeah, anyway, you need to clean yourfucking penis. You sign the bitch. Yeah, actually, here this goesfor circumcised, or I'm so concised people, to prevent infections and to expect forany signs of ration, such as rashes blisters. What's our unusual discharge, such as my Dick? Hello, Imagine Gone Dick. Foreskin should bepulled back and clean to prevent SMINGMA build up. Oh, Dick Cheese,which it's actually just natural boil and it is not actual cheese. Do noteat it. I swear to God, I will smite my God. Thatwas a that Max was talking that, not that. That was what ourfriend was talking about on our group chat. And then we talked about fermenting scenen. Yep, yeah, I remember that, Conna say, I rememberthat. Let me time, because I walked in on that conversation and Ihated every part of knowe. Youtube. You're welcome anyway. So SMA canlead to I think it's I I tried to say this correctly. I maynot have magma. Oh No, not make what it's Balancis, Lantis isblanchis the right tone? I think it's like Balanitis Blonitis, which is anedition with a head of the penis becomes...

...red and inflamed. So clean yourfucking junkie son of a bitches. Yes, and although penis is problem, includepen rony disease, which develops an abnormal Scott issue inside the penis.That sounds fucking disgusting. Thank you. Pie Moses with a for skin ofan UNCIRCER sized penis cannot be pulled over the head of the penis because yourhead is too fucking big. Big Bra how most para pair of para.First, paraphmosis, I think heys with the fourth king can't return to herown position after being attracted. And Penis Cancer, which usually starts off likea blister on the penis which grows more like a Warti. So I donot have that as far as I am aware. Excellent. I don't havecans. So kids, good job. That's good. I think sodd.Why had cancer? anyways, this is getting those joke moving on. Yeah, because you haven't a sex yet. Right, yeah, because you're aminor. Yeah, yeah, yeah, he's within the legal consent range,though. It's legal. anyways. Male infidelity. So Child Hello, whyare we talking about child marriage? I'll go I know. Okay, anyways. Well, I mean there's a there's a very, very large difference betweenthe age of consent and child marriage. We'll not get into that today.Okay. Male infertility is the inability to...

...produce viable sperm. In some cases, male infertility can be remedied with lifestyle changes, such as diet changes orwearing looser pants. I don't know that was the thing. Yeah, tightpants overheat the sperm. It's why I have the loosest pants in the world, because I would like to have children one day. So male birth controlcan just be skinny jeans. Oh my God, I mean yeah, technically, I mean that's like the male version of drinking guyalty. Any eyes.Infertility can also be caused by problems with whether there's an insufficient amount of testosteror Fsah, or problems with the PTUITARY thing. Symptoms of infertility cause byan underlying condition include problems, it's like auction, pain, lumps or swelledlike a lower than normal sperm count at normal breast growth under the intricators ofhormonal or chromosomal abnormality. You did it, bestie. Yes, good job,good job, you finished it. Proud of you. And lastly,one of the most common issues with the male reproductive system is prostate cancer.Prostate is below the bladder and is one of the glands that contributes to seemenproduction. Signs and symptoms include trouble urinating blood in the urine and or seamen, erectile dysfunction and waits. Because prostate cancer is so common, especially withage, men who are fifty years and older are recommended getting annual blood test. And that's all my penis knowledge. So, Jackson, seeing as youhave one, please continue to inform us, like if I missed anything in myscript. You know I said this once and I will say it again. Men have no idea what penises are,...

...yet we enjoy touching them. Thankyou for coming to my podcast, and you're valid as fuck. Ilove that so much and I incredible. Include makes me. I may cryafter this is over. Oh No, best you can. We have tokill someone, right, Bestie, your two hundred and sixty soft yeah,there's not a lot else to add. Um, don't be silly. Wrapyou're Willie. Don't be silly. Wrap you really make sure to clean aftercoming every time and make sure not to like put random stuff on your Dickif you're not sure what is in it. If you put something wrong and thereyou're going to cause an affection, you're going to cause you irritation.To just make sure whatever you putting your Dick, you know what you're puttingon your Dick and you know it's not gonna halt you don't put your PoleMail on it. I think that should just be a thing that you shouldn'tdo. No matter. I don't think that should be something you consider.Well, I know you. Who Did you know me? Picture today.I want to hear anymore. Thank you so much for coming to today's episode. We hope you enjoyed it. We hopefully you loan something and we hopeto you next week. If not, have a good rest of your life. Unless your name is some Moan. Is there. You know this book? Um, I've I really have nothing to say. Thank you, guys. Bye.

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